chains.

Image

I found this picture on Pinterest tonight and had to process it through writing, which I’m sharing with you here.

I cannot speak for others, but I know for me, my chains have been released. But removed? I don’t think so, not for me at least. Through grace and through the cross, those chains are released, unlocked, loosened but I tend to still carry them around, hold them up on my fragile being. I wonder why. If I really think about it, it’s probably because I don’t know what it’s like to be completely free of my chains, my hardships, my broken heart, my sin, my depression, my devestation, my insecurities, my doubt, my hate, my emptiness. I’ve spent so long, my entire life, adding on more weight, more heavy chains onto my soul; yet thousands of years ago, Jesus died for me. That moment, the chains were unlocked, they dropped yet daily, I grab them back up, throw them around my body and try to walk.

What would it be like to run? What would it be like to dance? What would it be like to raise my hands up? What would it be like to touch another person without cold metal? I’m not sure but I know that whatever it’s like is how God created me to live.

Yet I’m still fighting so hard to keep my chains on.

I don’t really know how to take them off, to loosen them. But I do think that it will take time and recovery, both of which I’m already working through. I know it takes love, support, community, intentional relationships, honesty, intimacy, vulnerability but none of that can be done until I fully trust God to not only release, but remove my chains.

If you would, please keep me in your prayers through my journey of learning to be free.

With lots of love,

Cammy.

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